Asteroid to Hit Earth in 2032

Sod it, take out that high APR credit card and put extra bleached sugar on your cereal. You have a couple of decades left then you’re toast. 

I’ve seen Deep Impact so I know how this goes down; only the geezers who can scramble up that massive hill really quickly will survive to repopulate the planet. Except this isn't a piddly asteroid that will cause a tidal wave and kill off everyone without a gold badge in swimming. This is a huge monster and technically a “Mini-Planet”. At 1,350ft wide the impact will create an explosion equivalent to 2,500 mega tons of TNT. To put that in perspective that’s 50 times the size of the biggest nuke ever detonated. That would be enough to cause a worldwide nuclear winter for anyone not instantly vaporised in the blast.

The impeding harbourer of doom was discovered this week by Ukrainian astronomers and has been labelled TV135. The sighting has since been confirmed by other astronomy groups in Spain, England, Italy and Russia.

But fear not they are not 100% yet on the exact trajectory so it could miss us and travel on to some other unsuspecting world or maybe come around and blow up your grandkids when they are spending your hard earned inheritance on 3D games and hover boards. Still on the off chance it doesn’t, I vote Britain allow Virgin Galactic to take the lead on building something massive to blow this up. I don’t think we can leave the survival of the planet in the same hands as the people who awarded the contract for the high speed rail expansion. 

Here is some handy advice to make you feel safer.