Wireless : Crime

Showing posts with label Crime. Show all posts

Man pulls Gun in Shop after being Refused £1 Discount

Prices can be pretty high these days, you can’t always afford everything you want. We get it. That’s why haggling is a thing; it pretty much never works, but occasionally you’ll get a couple of quid knocked off just by asking. Or so we hear, we’ve never actually seen it happen. But a man in Manchester liked his chances and thought he’d try asking for £1 off when he tried to buy 2 bottles of beer.

Repeatedly is probably an understatement. This guy called them 30 TIMES over the course of 4 hours to let them know the ins and outs of his sexual endeavours. How bombed do you have to be to think it’s a good idea to call emergency services for 4 hours about what you get up to in the bedroom? Surely if you’re drunk enough to think that’s a great plan, you’d be too drunk to actually execute it…

Denver Lee St. Clair apparently had the same kind of relationship with his stepson that many people have had with childhood bullies.

So, you’ve had to go into hospital for surgery. Not ideal, but at least you’ll be operated on by someone qualified. As in someone professional, who is responsible and knows what they’re doing. Someone who you can trust to be digging around in all the squishy goo inside that makes you work. Unfortunately, sometimes, someone you probably wouldn’t want messing around with your vital organs manages to get in there anyway.

George Zimmerman Painting Sells For $100,099 on Ebay

The American gunman has sold his first painting on ebay for the whopping sum of $100,099.99.

George Zimmerman shot dead 17 year old American high school student Teyvon Martin in 2012 but was acquitted of the charge of manslaughter in June of this year. He shot the teen after allegedly acting in self-defense, following an altercation between the two that left him with head injuries.

The 30 year old has said he has found an outlet for the frustration and emotion caused by the court case, and the abuse he has received from it, in the form of art. And now some chump has paid over 100 grand for the "pleasure" of having the work hang in their house.

Zimmerman said on the ebay post attached to his work "First hand painted artwork by me, George Zimmerman. Everyone has been asking what I have been doing with myself. I found a creative, way to express myself, my emotions and the symbols that represent my experiences. My art work allows me to reflect, providing a therapeutic outlet and allows me to remain indoors; I hope you enjoy owning this piece as much as I enjoyed creating it. Your friend, George Zimmerman.”

The painting itself seems to be trying to show some level of patriotism but ultimately just strikes the eye as being really, really blue. Newscorpse.com has also gone so far as to call the "original" work, a copy, demonstrating that it could be a cold coloured copy of a Shutterstock picture.

As if having this piece of... art, in their house, the winning bidder number 96 (that's right, 96 people actually wanted this thing) will be having the painting hand delivered by Zimmerman himself, who has promised to bring the parcel in person.

Because what better way to start the new year than with a visit from a trigger happy "artist"!?

The sum that the painting has gone for is amazing given that works by legitimate artists such as Vincent Van Gogh have been sold for less money than that.

Yet, infamy is something that makes art by certain people, desirable to collectors. For example, Adolf Hitler was a total bastard, yet his drawings demand huge amounts at auction, with an individual work going for $42,200 and a collection of 15 for $100,000.

Considering the number of people who are aware of Hitler in comparison with the number who know Zimmerman, the price his painting fetched is astounding.

Comparing Zimmerman to Hitler is maybe taking it a bit far. But all I can say is that I really hope that person bought the painting with the intention of destroying it. Just because you have a paintbrush, doesn't make you a good artist. It can, however, make you very rich.

Gemma Clark

Def Leppard to Sue One Direction

If you’re lucky, you won’t have heard One Direction’s latest tune, Midnight Memories. That said, you probably will have by the time you get to the end of this article, because you’ll no doubt want to check for yourself. That’s why I have to live with the fact I’ve heard it three times now.

Scam Bait; Gazz Wood vs Ban Ki Moon

Like many people, I have a real e-mail address and a junk e-mail address. The real one is for business correspondance, Amazon order confirmations and my phone bill. The junk address (hotmail, of course) is for when a website requires that I sign up or enter a valid e-mail before allowing me to continue. 4od has my junk address, as does Cadburys from when I won that Crispello last month.

Since I use the junk address to indistriminately sign up for things, I receive an inordinate amount of spam. Phishing e-mails, scammers and a number of tragedy striken members of the royal family of Nigeria get hold of me on a daily basis trying to trick me into handing over quick cash. I usually just delete these e-mails, but the other day I received one from Ban Ki Moon, Secretary General of the United Nations!

It was titled “The Truth About Your Fund” and began with the words “Dear Victim…” so obviously I was in.

“Dear Victim,

Drunk Driving Killer Teenager Too Rich to Jail

Yep you read that correctly, a teenager from USA who drove his car whilst three times over the limit and killed four people and seriously injured others isn’t going to prison because “he is too rich for jail”

Ethan Couch, 16 from Texas, USA robbed beer from a local branch of Walmart and he and seven friends jumped in a pickup truck and left a horrific path of destruction on their drive.

Supermarket Re-sells Meat Found in Thief’s Pants

A convenience store in Canada recently discovered a man trying to steal from them by stuffing the goods down his trousers. So they did what any good store would do in that situation. They removed the goods from the man’s trousers and re-sold them to the unsuspecting public.

Jeffrey Feehan, a 29 year old man, decided to rob a convenience store. But he wanted to put his own spin on it and do something original. So that meant he couldn’t hold up the cashier at gunpoint, or go round with a large empty bag or stuff small items in his pockets. Those are all played out, common forms of thievery. That’s not how Jeffrey plays, he likes to be unique. So he decided to take $71 (£41) worth of chicken breasts, bacon and steak down his trousers to join his own meat.

Teen Arrested for Robbery After Stopping for a Selfie

A Swedish teen has been convicted for robbery after taking a pre-rob selfie.

In March this year a 17 year old girl and accomplice decided to go and rob a Max Hambuger restaurant in Halmstead, Sweden. Prior to doing so, the nitwits thought to mark the occasion with a good-luck pre-rob selfie donned in balaclavas wielding a 30cm knife.

Man Who Went on Naked, Racist, 'fire-extinguisher-up-the-bum' Rampage Walks a Free

Remember the guy a few weeks ago that went on that incredibly random (slightly disturbing) racist rampage through a Premier Inn? Well he’s walked free from court! Presumably with the pipe out of his bum.

Joseph Small, 20, admitted to causing criminal damage on his ‘adventure’ through the corridors of the London hotel branch.

Angry eBay User Receives Free Xbox For Being A Moron

It looks like Santa favours responding to idiots over people who are actually in need. You’ll probably be well-acquainted with the story that broke a few days ago about a disgruntled eBay user that paid £450 for an Xbox One, only to receive a picture of one instead.

What a bummer.

The Onion is getting better and better. The comments are always worth checking out too.

Australian Army in Jedi Council Sex Scandal

The alleged ringleader of a sex ring calling themselves the "Knights of the Jedi Council" was charged by New South Wales police in Queanbeyan, Australia last week.

Army Chief Lieutenant General David Morrison

Hastings Fredrickson, 40, is a former army commando with the Australian Defence Force (ADF), a branch of the Australian Army, and stands accused of leading a group of 17 men who allegedly shared videos and images of naked women without their knowledge. Some members of the group were even challenged to bed the women and film it.

Man Accidentally Butt Dials His Intended Victim While Plotting His Murder

An American man was caught plotting the murder of a former employee when he accidentally butt-dialed his intended victim.

Larry Barnett, of Jonesboro Arkansas, faces murder charges after plotting to kill a former employee.

Amish Horse and Buggy Involved in Fatal Drive-by Shooting

Police in Pennsylvania's Amish country say a horse pulling a buggy has been killed in a drive-by shooting.

An Amish family were travelling in the traditional horse and cart buggy when a conventional car slowed and pulled alongside. The family reported what they described as a fire cracker then the other car sped away.

Girl Tweets "2 Drunk 2 Care" at Party - Later Crashes and Kills Two People

Two people were killed after their car was hit by an on-coming driver just several hours after the driver allegedly tweeted “2 drunk 2 care”.

Kayla Mendoza, 20, was driving in Florida early in the morning of 17^th November and was on the wrong side of the road when the collision happened. Marisa Catronio, 21, was killed instantly while Kaitlyn Nicole Ferrante, 21, died of her injuries sustained in the accident several days later.

Man Arrested for Screaming “There’s a bomb on the plane!”

An Atlanta man who is either a completely wasted or has mental health issues terrifies the other passengers by screaming, “There’s bomb on the plane!”

The other passengers seem to take it in their stride. Which begs the question, would you stay on that plane?

In news that has caused shockwaves throughout the community, and sparked inevitable debates on the internet, a 16 year old lad from Cardiff allegedly got laid recently. Whilst on study leave for his GCSEs, this unnamed pupil (hereforth referred to as the lad) has done what many boys his age can only dream of, and slept with his teacher.

Man Caught Jerking Off in Walmart

A man was caught cracking one off in his local Walmart this week.

The 37 year from Tulsa was found naked and having the time of his live in the ladies bathroom by a horrified shopper.